1/02/01
Softball: Prospects for the New Year
Dear People,
As we enter yet another millennium as the world’s finest unaffiliated email organized softball league West of the Sacramento River, the pulsating strains of “Thus Spoke Zarathruta” still ricochet through the pride-replete synapti of my cozily ensconced auditory cortex. The simple fact is that we as a community are now playing at a level of aerobic excellence that shames the so-called “professionals” at their own game, but of course, with such stellar aerobic magnificence comes ever greater challenges.
I am well aware, for example, that Alex Rodriguez recently signed with the Texas Rangers for $250,000,000 over 10 years, and that even Darren Driefort, who I’ve never heard of, agreed to play with the Dodgers for $55,000,000 over five years. Look, the blunt reality is that I am not oblivious to the inexorable forces of the athletic market place, and thus as organizer of this league, I fully accept that I will now have to raise the bar in order to keep many of you from drifting to greener pastures in the months to come. I won’t name names, but clearly Jen and Zack will need to be wooed like never before, and as a player, even I do not rule out going on strike against my own brutal managerial other self.
Unfortunately though, the community budget remains somewhat constrained, and thus I am leaning toward more creative approaches in order to calm your inevitable material yearnings. For example, one possibility is to automatically supply a post-game tin of fully boned Estonian breeding squid for every player who shows. I wouldn’t announce it on the email, it would just be there, every game, week after week. I can assure you that the Texas Rangers have no funds set aside for such succulent Baltic delicacies, but if that’s what it takes, I’m willing to do it.
In the meantime, there will be a game at San Pablo this Sunday at noon, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning….Raymond
PS: Some sundry turn of the year housekeeping (!):
1) “Commits” have gotten a bit sloppy of late. Please only make them if you’re reasonably certain you can actually show up, and if you later need to retract, try to let me know asap. I actually put a decent amount of time into fine-tuning the turn-out with a variety of personal exhortations and shameless threats, but it’s hard to hit my target goal of 20 players if I don’t know what I’m working with.
More specifically, flaking is very uncool no matter how many players you think will make it. If we’re near 22 and you don’t show up, there’s a decent chance a person who wanted to play didn’t come, since they assumed the game was full. And of course when we’re near a minimum quorum, a no-show is just a real bummer.
2) I think the zeitgeist at certain games has gotten a bit too serious. The fact is that outside of Jen and myself, nobody plays at a level that is worthy of such competitive intensity. When in doubt, please mellow out and treat your fellow athletes as the cherished familial cuddling balls that they essentially are.
3) Some of you have been bringing your pet snakes, komodo dragons, and other non-mammalian rodentia to the games. This is totally unacceptable.
4) For those who would like to get unabashedly sentimental, these missives are now up to date at http://www.eslnotes.com/ray/6.html
1/4/01
Softball: Pent-up Demand
Dear People,
There will be a game at San Pablo Park this Sunday at noon, but alas, there are now 22 commits. Feel free to call for news on late cancels….Ray 845-7552
PS: $2/Frisbee afterward.
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