1/22/14

Softball: Testing the Borders of Metaphorical Abuse

Dear People,

Anthony's team decimated my own, 21-11, and frankly, they did so by exploiting a disturbing contagion that had spread quickly throughout my side's floundering defensive ramparts-specifically, viral sieveitis. In any case, the outbreak began when Pace let several treacherous 1st-inning hoppers blast right past his head, neck and glove as well as directly between his alluring yet feckless gams. Of course, being the nurturing captain that I am, I later assured him that even though the Antman's contingent had now jumped out to an 8-0 lead, I couldn't be prouder of a player. Indeed, I insisted that he remain at short, for all I needed him to do was to stay focused and shake it off.

The Pacemeister apparently took this advice literally and thus sprinkled his perniciously infectious sieve juice directly into the mitts of both Jay and Rachel. They in turn proceeded to misplay a score of line drives to the left side of the outfield, and in fact, they would go on to let another 37 grounders dart directly through their own tragically porous leggies. Alas, Pace himself continued to struggle, as if he were now fighting virus, guilt and ball in one devastating multi-pronged onslaught. Needless to say, J and R further absorbed his pain and his unsightly lack of eptitude, and thus, as I looked out at the mid-inning carnage of our once great left of center, I all but broke down and wailed.

It was an admittedly compelling display of trilateral aerobic excellence in its most degraded form, yet as a trio, Pace, Jay and Rachel eventually stabilized, persevered and even congealed by the end of the 7th. To be sure, their inherent dignity is an inspirational fillip for all those who've ever yearned to simply bounce back, and so while it's true that my team still crashed and burned, I get chills when I think that even if they hadn't congealed, ours is a community in which they will always be welcome to jump right back on that horse and return for the very next match-reflective, grateful and sieverhea free. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning. . . Raymond


1/23/14

Softball: A Post-Game Social Security Picnic! (And other vital community news)

Dear People,

There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, and as of now it is full. As always, you are welcome to sign up for the wait list or contact me later for news of reopened slots, and if you committed and need to cancel, please let me know ASAP.

This week's field fee is just $5, and that includes my personal guarantee that Codornices will remain polar-vortex free for the duration of the match…Raymond 845-7552

PS: Alan Miller, one of the great moral backbones of this entire community, and as far as I know, the only player to consistently hit over .800 for several years running, has just turned 65! Of course 65 is the new 63 and 5/8th, so the Millernator will certainly be batting up a storm for decades to come. Regardless, Enid and I have decided to have a spontaneous post-match potluck picnic in his honor.

SO, if you plan to stick around, please bring a sandwich or equivalent for yourself as well as something simple and scrumptious for the communal whole. All are welcome to join in.

PPS: Would you like to see Spoken Road, featuring our very own Kora and Chris Fure, this Saturday night at Café Leila on San Pablo? Well then, you're in luck!....
https://www.facebook.com/events/588087391241070/

PPPS: Lawrence Weschler, the eminent New Yorker intellectual with suggestively spindly softball legs who happens to be my very own brother, will be speaking on perception, science and art on Monday evening! So yeah, if you'd like to get high without the weed (and who wouldn't?), here's your chance. . .

http://townsendcenter.berkeley.edu/events/lawrence-weschler-writer

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