1/26/05

Softball: The Higher Callings of Athletic Man

Dear People,

Frank’s team crushed my own 20-11, but only because of one God-like superhero, and needless to say, it wasn’t Frank. For eight long and brutal innings, Ehud tormented my batters with callous indifference to their tiny little feelings, and thus he held my entire contingent to just two pitiful runs. Fortunately for my side, Frank came in for the final-inning "save," and promptly gave up 15 straight hits for our pride-restoring salvation. Still, the Huudster’s raw dominance—over stirring and sassy sluggers like Broh, Ken, Tom O. and yes, even Terri—has left me both baffled and shaken, and while I’d like to dismiss it all as the random flukeage of mere aerobic karma, I think this performance has broader implications for that nettlesome question of "value" in sport.

For example, just two days before Ehud reset the bar for all of our own pitchers, Roger Clemens, aged 42, signed a one-year $18 million dollar contract with the Houston Astros. Does this mean I should be paying Udi a comparable salary? I simply don’t know. Yet let’s be honest: While it’s true that Clemens is both a couple years younger and throws technically "better" pitches, that little punk wouldn’t know a potassium channel voltage sensor, or even a simple protein, if it bit him on his overpaid ass. Udi, of course, invented most of the best proteins that we all use today, and as Cal’s neurobiologist extraordinaire, I have no doubt he’d be a cherished favorite of Professional Baseball’s fiercely academic fan base.

Still, I remain guardedly optimistic that Ehud will end his career in our own humble little unaffiliated email-organized amateur league, because he, like you, is simply not interested in tossing a stupid leather orb at a bunch of protein-ignorant stick-wielding jock-whores, even if he could make $18 million dollars a year doing it. Yeah, it’s all about values, and I think we all understand that. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Raymond


1/27/05

Softball: Your All-American Dog Party Sport!

Dear People,

There will (hopefully) be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, and as of now, it is full. As always, please contact me ASAP if you committed and need to cancel, lest you be impolite to those poor innocent sods now floundering on the waitlist. You will also need to check email/voicemail on Sunday morning, since even though it will probably be sunny, the field may be officially closed and/or actually malarial. Life is a judgement call, and as your cardiovascular advocate, I’ll always error on the semi-risky side of your aerobic yearnings.

In any case, I would also like to announce that at 3PM that afternoon, Nanci will be having a 13th birthday party for her beloved snouzer hound, Theo, whose rye canine wit has sporadically graced our games for nearly three years. All community members are invited to Theo’s Bark Mitzvah, to be held at Nanci’s house in Emeryville. For all relevant details, see the evite below:

http://www.evite.com/pages/invite/viewInvite.jsp?inviteId=FCOHYJBFRSEPKNNQTIHQ&src=email

$2 for the field/Liver snaps for the pooch…Raymond 845-7552

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