2/13/13

Softball: The State of the Aerobic Union

Dear People,

My team drowned Chris Fure's in a Norquistian bathtub of basic athletic tragedy, 12-7. Frankly, I don't remember that much about it because I was febrile, feeling languid and fighting against some kind of Contemptible Viral Flu-Thing- CVFT, which, FWIW, is apparently not covered by the stupid flu shot I got last month.

Still, I vaguely recall various plays in which Maria twisted her finger, Mary broke her finger nail and Dave Ross continued his unparalleled streak of heroism by snagging Mike Davey's sky-high pop-up, 20 full feet behind 1st. The Rossinator pedaled backward while his focused little eyeballs stayed glued to the clouds, but of course as soon as the plummeting orb smashed into the webbing of his gallantly outstretched mitt, he went down, and down hard, as if he were the vulnerably nude 5-pin in an Andy Varipapa snake-eyes split (Sure; Google him). Fortunately, both his glasses and skull will be fine, but in this week of our annual communal appraisal, this triple wave of carnage has heavily weighed on my continually wheezing bosom.

So here's the bottom line as we approach our 16th year: Indeed, we're suffering way too many brutal injuries (including broken bones, battered tibias and non-gonococcal urethritis), we continue to bicker over way too many issues, our relations with the city are strained, we're widely held in contempt by players of other sports, and of course we're still way too white, male and old. And if that weren't bad enough, a good 80-90% of us are what the American Psychological Association starkly refers to as clinically meshuga. Yeah, we've got issues, and I'm not gonna sugarcoat it.

Nevertheless, while it would be easy to pull a spontaneous Papal Skedaddle and return to my cherished childhood dacha in the sorghum-laden hills of rural Bratislava, that's simply not my style. Instead, I plan to roll up my sleeves, focus like a laser on the most pressing challenges we face, and then accept that since changing stuff is really hard, our problems may or may not fester for a few more decades. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, If I get enough commits by this Friday morning. . .Raymond


2/15/13

Softball: Perils of Nature, #834

Dear People,

There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, and as of now it is full. As always, please let me know ASAP if you committed and need to cancel, and if you still want in, feel free to get on the wait list or contact me later for news of reopened slots.

Please bring $4 for the field, which for this week only includes comprehensive meteorite insurance for the duration of the match. . . .Raymond 845-7552

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