Softball: Your Perennial Enlightenment-Shtick Sport
Dear People,
Although she bitterly protested her appointment as opposing captain, Ellen rose to the occasion with awe-inspiring joie-de-luck, leading her team over mine in 10 grueling innings, 17-11. Of course I’m a tad disappointed that my own side eventually crumbled, and yet all was not lost. Indeed, my beloved brother Robert showed up from Seattle, played with surprisingly robust mediocrity, and in the end, did almost nothing to dishonor the family name; I think I’ll keep him.
In any case, today is the 231st anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence (give or take a month), and a lot of you are no doubt thinking that you might as well take off for an extended holiday weekend in order to hang out in Yosemite or Sequoia or some other spider-infested tourist trap where feral coons, boar and eel stalk unsuspecting urbanites. That sounds divine, and believe you me, I’m tempted.
Nevertheless, I would gently suggest that on this special day, we would do well to ponder the true significance of our Colonial forefathers and how they might have seen our own aerobic democracy. Now normally I would be hesitant to even say such a thing, if for no other reason than the lack of relevant texts to flush out such brazen speculations. But then it suddenly occurred to me that I’ve addressed this very issue before (10 years in a row, though who’s counting?), and while none of the following analysis made the 10 year anniversary t-shirt, I still believe that history itself requires that we read it anew….
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As the 4th approaches, I am reminded of the intense pressures that Jefferson, Adams and Franklin must have felt when they decided to pen that most momentous of definitive divorces, their very lives at stake as cunning little fish-and-chips eating British troops scampered throughout the Pennsylvania bush. These intrepid and indefatigable revolutionaries would have no doubt given anything to play an exciting game of softball, but stuck as they were in the 18th century, they had to settle for yeoman farming and really boring arguments about the nature of mercantilism. I think you see my point. Make that commit. Do it for the children. Do it now. Indeed, the line from Alexander Hamilton to Jackie Robinson to all of you is the very essence of the American experience....
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The point is that I happen to think that 10 years later, what I wrote then is more pertinent than ever. Yes, our highest Court is now effectively controlled by judicial vipers, our current President is a fatuous dolt, our entire planet is apparently roasting and religiocretin lunes around the world are ruining everything. But hey, there is always softball—aerobic, email-organized, unaffiliated and pure—and if that isn't enough to keep you from the contemptible tourist-stalking Sierra Eels, then I don't know what is. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Ray
PS: I will be out of town with only occasional e-mail access for the next several days, so don't panic if it takes me a bit longer than usual to confirm your commits.