10/4/00
Softball: A Tribe That Roams
Dear People,
Congratz to all on last week’s resplendent won-on-the-last-hit 24-23 semi-nocturnal exploration of all that is aerobically feasible within the foggy twilight-zonesque setting that is San Pablo at dusk---cold, dark, and empty, save those16 lonely souls whose thirst for recreational closure proved once again that gentle folk with clinical psychosis are still capable of greatness. And yes, technically, my team did lose, but let the record show that as the bases began to fill in the bottom of the 9th, what little light remained was soon a distant memory of vital waveulets denied, and while the incandescent orange orb that served as the official game ball was admittedly as radiant as Uranus in Spring, there is simply no objective advantage to playing defense while legally blind.
In any case, it seems to me that as long as tactical dual-tube night vision goggles remain inexplicably banned from the game, we are fighting a losing battle against harsh temporal realities. Throw in the presence of the curiously hostile soccer playing peoples, and I fear that once again we must search for another homeland, just one more journey in our ceaseless athletic Diaspora.
I suppose that a lot of you aren’t going to buy into the validity of this most cherished of Judeo-Aerobic metaphors, and I certainly admit that as we wander from Codornices to San Pablo to yet another venue in less than one month’s time, you probably feel cheap, lewd and even tawdry. Frankly, that would be a charitable description for most of us, but there is no shame in that per se, and therefore, there will be a game this Sunday at 11AM at ALBANY’s majestic Middle School Park (on Buchanan between San Pablo and the freeway), hopefully followed by a grueling yet succulent match of ultimate frisbee, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Raymond
10/6/00
Softball: The High Risks of Reticence
Dear People,
It is Friday morning and we are still shamefully short of a minimum quorum for Sunday’s game. Unfortunately, I simply don’t have the time to woo you with yet one more pointless pre-war story about some tiny little overpaid self-absorbed professional baseball playing brat. If nothing else, and with the one exception of the great "Shoeless" Joe Jackson, I honestly don’t believe those people are appropriate role models for today’s ethically troubled youth.
In any case, let me get straight to the point; If I don’t get at least six more commits within the next few hours, there will be no game. That’s not a threat, but just harsh reality, as icy and sobering as a much anticipated blind date gone terribly, terribly wrong. Which is to say that I’m not driving to Albany City Hall to obtain a reservation slip that I can’t be sure we’ll even use. And speaking of Albany, I would like to just gently point out that it’s not like their Mayor derives any particular political capital by letting people like you and me play in his park. Believe me, he doesn’t. Nevertheless, I implore you to make that commit, if for no other reason that as hopes for peace and democratic renewal spread throughout the Balkans, from the streets of Belgrade to Kosovo and perhaps on to Albania itself, we in the East Bay owe our local Albanyians a modicum of geo-recreational respect.
Update this afternoon…….Raymond
10/6/00
Softball: The Brutal Cost of Organizational Integrity
Dear People,
I must sadly announce that for the second time in less than four months, there will not be a game this weekend because we have failed to reach a quorum. I am appointing a bipartisan commission
to look into the root causes of this disturbing crisis of floundering aerobic resolve, and if my leadership is found wanting, I will not hesitate to resign, and immediately return to my beloved pine cottage in suburban Bratislava…..Raymond
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