12/10/14

Softball: That Which does not Kill Us . . .

Dear People,

My team brined Paul Fine's in the cold turbid waters of Bushrod's tragically storm-ravaged infield, 13-7, and while it was a bitter defeat for Paulie's posse, it was still a triumph of pure derring-do for the community as a hole-And no, I'm not exploiting that whomophone just because of the literary license one gets when discussing anything related to a park called 'Bush-Rod.' In any case, players from every other league on earth would've undoubtedly fled straight to the internal warmth of the nearest semi-nude twister bar as soon as they saw the syphilitic pool of sludge that covered every inch of ground from just behind short to the distressed green grasses of moist shallow left, but of course, we're not like all those other losers.

Indeed, as soon as we arrived at The Rod, most of us grabbed the bull by the boggy-little-balls and immediately got to work, with Jerry and Alan Shabel leading the construction of a network of darling little culverts-all in less than 30 minutes!-that drained away a solid 48.7% of the game-threatening slurry. In other words, it was a paragon of emergency Roman engineering that was admittedly not perfect or pretty or even that “successful,” and yet the relative improvement was so inspiring that we all took to the field with both vigor and gratitude, and of course, the continued and ceaseless risk of shattered ankles, dysentery and drowning.

Thankfully, not a single player was hurt, although Jim McGuire's stirring 2nd-inning scramble for Lora's shallow pop-up to left exposed a curious knee-deep puddle near the 3rd-base line, and even more ominous, the disturbing presence of pre-pubescent nipping-sturgeon. Jim took it all stoically, and to be sure, with his quick mastery of the treacherous terrain at short, he was the moral backbone of our awesome defense. Alan, on the other hand, was a potentially greater shortstop for Paul's side, and yet I noticed that by game's end, Jimmy was disheveled, filthy beyond words and soaked to the gills from toe to groin and beyond, whereas the Shabelator appeared basically dry and genteel. Now, does this staggering contrast in post-match aesthetics tacitly imply how my team kicked ass? I honestly don't know.

The point is that as a recreational folk, we have clearly shown that as we wander from one field to another with the objectively lax morals of your basic common garden tart, we will not be impeded by the conceptual restraints of territorial 'standards.' This is, of course, both a challenge and a relief, for as the hideous rains continue in this season of our exile, I assume I now have your approval to seize any necessary venue where we can simply bat, run, catch and frolic. And therefore there will be a game this Sunday at 11 at San Pablo #2, or perhaps Bushrod, or maybe Highway 80 by University Ave (where we can join our logic-lovin' neighbors for a friendly traffic-calming game of anarchyball), IF I get enough commits by this Friday Morning . . . Raymond


12/11/14

Softball: Determined . . .

Dear People,

There will hopefully/probably/maybe be a game this Sunday at 11 at San Pablo # 2 or Bushrod or one of the Astroturf Fields or perhaps some intriguing wildcard venue that you haven't even heard of, and as of now there are 4 slots left.

You will need to check email that morning around 10:22.08, and because I know you're feeling anxious, I may update you sooner if my Saturday afternoon tour of our potential squall-battered soils reveals anything definitive. In the meantime, you should remain calm, stout and ready to boogie . . . Raymond



12/13/14

Softball: Saturday 4:30 PM: The Warmth of the Sun!

Dear People,

As of now, it's looking very good for Bushrod again, with actual conditions already better than last week (in part because our network of ingenious water-sucking culverts continue to drain the infield). Still, you will need to wait for the go-ahead email tomorrow morning around 10:23:07, assuring you that Jerry and Anthony have successfully seized the field.

Also, there are still a few puddles around the plate, mound and other areas, so I may once again ask for volunteers to get there early with buckets, shovels and hoes. Yeah, steely little tarts.

Three slots still left!/Stay tuned . . . Raymond 845-7552 cell 759-6819

PS: For Bushrod, get to Telegraph and turn West on 61st:

http://www.yelp.com/biz/bushrod-park-oakland

PPS: San Pablo #2 remains a ghastly malarial suck-swamp, Witter is locked and Underhill is likely taken.


12/14/14

Softball: Sunday, 10:23: Another Triumph of Aerobic Grit!

See you at Bushrod at 11, and if you can, please show up ASAP since the better #1 Field is currently being held by Jerry and Anthony (We may have to switch, in which case you may be volanteered for bucket duty)….Ray 845-7552 cell: 759-6819

PS: For Bushrod, get to Telegraph and turn West on 61st:

http://www.yelp.com/biz/bushrod-park-oakland

PP: Two slots still left…

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